The other day, I was at a convenience store in Ontario, grabbing some snacks, when I overheard two elderly gentlemen having a conversation that instantly transported me back to my roots. One of them said, “Yeah, my son’s not seeing anyone right now,” and the other replied, “Oh, my daughter’s single too. Should I tell my son to give your daughter a call?” I nearly dropped my bag of chips.
Wait a minute, isn't this an arranged marriage scenario? But wait, we're in Canada! Isn't this the place where you're meant to find someone on dating apps, have meet-cutes, and have someone say casually, "I'm just seeing where this goes"? And here were two parents casually setting up a possible love scenario for their adult children in the midst of a discussion about lottery tickets and milk.
And that's when it struck me — arranged marriages are everywhere. They've simply gone underground, disguising themselves within cultures like covert ninjas. Whether marriages are arranged by parents for their children or friends play matchmaker, the fundamental idea remains the same: two individuals brought together by a third, in the hopes of a lifelong commitment. The only thing that's different is the packaging.
India: The Traditional Home of Arranged Marriages (Now Wi-Fi Enabled)
Now, let's get real — when it comes to arranged marriages, India is the pioneer. We didn't just stop at parental matchmaking, we took it online and created matrimonial websites before the world even knew what swiping right meant.
While the West was still trying to figure out dating apps that led to situationships and messages that casually said, "Hey, u up?", India said, "We're going to make whole platforms dedicated to finding you a life partner." Welcome Shaadi.com, Jeevansathi.com, and BharatMatrimony.com - the OG commitment pioneers.
These websites don't focus on quick flings. No, they're founded upon family making, horoscope matching, and every so often deciding whether your great-great-grandfathers went to the same temple. That's a whole other level of dedication.
And you know what? It actually works. Millions of individuals have met their spouses on these sites, while Indian matrimonial websites are booking wedding dates faster than you can say the word "biodata" ,in contrast to dating apps which have issues with individuals disappearing after three messages.
The Evolution: From "I Do" to "Let's See"
Now, let's deal with the elephant in the room. The notion that Indian arranged marriages are two individuals marrying each other without having ever met, simply because their parents told them to that's so last century. Seriously, if you still believe that occurs on a regular basis, you're living in a B grade Bollywood movie from the '90s.
Indian arranged marriages nowadays are like the ultimate fusion of tradition and Tinder without the cheesy bios like, "Love hiking, hate drama." Your parents might set you up, but then that's it. You go out, talk, date, and figure out if you're a match. It's like your own personal algorithm, except instead of AI, it's your mom.
In fact, India is well ahead of the curve on this one. Where the West is still debating whether dating apps can result in long-term commitment, India is already using its matchmaking websites to form marriages that last decades.
Disguised Matrimonial Websites That Are Dating Apps
Speaking of apps, did you notice how some dating websites unapologetically label themselves as "serious relationship only" spaces? You know the ones, they say that they don't even have the possibility of flings.
If the main selling point of your app is the line, "We're here for long-term relationships, not short-term fun," then well done - you've just recreated the concept of arranged matchmaking, with a Silicon Valley spin.
Imagine a world where those apps adopted honesty:
Dating apps stating, "Designed to be deleted… but only after your big fat wedding."
It's the same game altogether only with more stylish profiles and less bio-datas.
Why the World is Catching Up
So why do arranged marriages or at least arranged introductions persist everywhere in the world? Simple: because they work.
When you remove the stress of having to find someone completely by yourself, you allow yourself to be open to possibilities that you would not have otherwise thought of. And who knows you better than your friends and family? Sometimes your parents actually do know what is best for you. Even in Western cultures, arrangements such as the one I heard at the convenience store occur constantly. Parents, friends, and communities tend to get involved when individuals are searching for something serious. The sole distinction is that in India, we institutionalized it and made it tech-savvy.
